A few weeks back, I read a post griping about LEDs being everywhere. And honestly? It hit home—literally. My NYC apartment is the size of a respectable closet, so my bedroom doubles as my home office. That means my UPS hulks on the floor next to my desk, the modem lurks under it, and the Synology hums quietly in the corner—each one stubbornly blinking like tiny lighthouses in my personal sea of tech clutter.

The UPS pulses steadily, as if counting down to its inevitable retirement. The Synology flickers whenever it’s writing data—which, given it stores my Mac’s Time Machine backups, org-mode files, and certain encrypted personal archives, feels oddly intrusive for a machine that knows my digital secrets. And the router? It’s got more LEDs than a ’90s calculator, blinking in chaotic patterns that make me wonder: Who the hell is my network communicating with at 2 in the morning?

Now, before you ask: “Why not move this tech out of your bedroom?” - trust me, I’ve tried. But in a city where “closet-sized” is a luxury, my “office” is whatever space isn’t currently occupied by my existential dread. So let’s set aside my spatial tragedy for a moment. Do we really need LEDs on everything?

Take my wireless charger. It’s got a little blue light that glows like the Eye of Sauron, bright enough to navigate by. I have to angle it away from my pillow every night, lest it sear my retinas during my 03:00 insomnia. Couldn’t they just… add an off switch? Or maybe a dimmer? I’d settle for a polite chime instead of this relentless visual announcement that my phone is, indeed, charging. And the power adapters! Bless their tiny circuits, but why does my phone charger need to scream “I’M PLUGGED IN!” with a neon beacon? It’s in the wall. That’s the point.

Somewhere along the line, LEDs stopped being useful indicators and became tech’s participation trophies. Who decided this? Was it a well-meaning engineer in the ’90s who thought, “What if we lit up everything?” And why blue? It took a Nobel Prize to perfect blue LEDs—so if they’re that complicated to make, maybe we could’ve just… not? Red means “danger,” but a soft amber glow to say “all’s well, go back to sleep”? Too much to ask.

I’ve even pondered ripping these LEDs out myself. How hard could it be? Hmmm…?

Anyway, this has been your weekly installment of Old Man Yells at Cloud™. You’re welcome. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some duct tape to apply to my router’s most offensive LED.

Footnotes:

  • Some of the humor here used AI. No, not the whole thing, the draft is written by a grumpy man in his 40s, as well end product, and many things in between. I just wanted some help with the humor, OK?

  • I tried, but I can’t find this post. I assume it was somewhere in my RSS feeds but I can’t find it now. If you know of anything like that, please let me know.